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Topic: I will catch Osama Bin Laden!

I am done screwing around, I'm taking matters into my own hands. I'm gonna go get his skinny ass. "No Russ, get off me!" "Put me down!" "I didn't have time to comb my beard!" Your out Bin Punked. Russ Dank is in the cave, and ready to make you behave!

NEWS FLASH!!! Russell Dank is a national hero. Russell challenged Osama Bin Laden to a game of "Loser gets arrested" Jarts. Russell won the best of 7 match, 4 games to 3. It was doubly dangerous because the jarts were metal tipped. Once again, Russell Dank, national hero!

Topic: Pay attention to the shoes.

Next time you are around a group of people, at a bar, at work, etc, check what kind of shoes people are wearing. If you pay close attention, you will then be able to spot who is taking a dump in the bathroom, then, you and your friends can make fun of them by calling them names like, pooper, crap ass, and my personal favorite, stank drawls. So don't forget, check the shoes.

Topic: Smelling Famous Women

Recently I amused myself by smelling the different scents that are being sold by Beyonce, JLo, Paris Hilton, and Britney Spears. Going into it you might expect that these chickies have a certain scent that might be offensive to some but since Russ D is the man this had to be done. First up, Beyonce. This fine lady had a very pleasing smell, I found nothing offensive about her stink and liked it very much, next JLo. Her smell was not as strong as I would have liked, I expected somthing stronger but it was kind of "eigh". Paris Hilton was next and I went into this thinking that this hoe bag would stink to high heaven but the smell of Paris was actually very sweet. I was very surprised, since this chick gets so much action I thought she would be stanky. Last but not least, the chick that I was looking forward to smelling, Britney Spears. This chick was stank, whfffff, man! Didn't like Britney's stank at all, oh well. The winner of the stank off is Beyonce, congrats girl!

Topic: The Chipmunks fight back

You thought the Chipmunks were cute? Check this shit out! These dudes are for real!

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